Thursday, April 19, 2007

What Troy recons: round four

People, or whatever you are, Troy is back...

I recon that my brennan article last week was harsh, but he still managed to underachieve against my bold prediction. Even though the bar I so harshly set him was the equivalent to the 1 metre high jump. You know, in high school where they place the bar at the same height as the mat for the dud kids. I apologise to all those people that did get him in, you probably hate me. I am not one to say I told you so, so I wont, I just hope that you followed through with the upper cut (not too hard) and I hope brennan gave himself a huge one that causes him to miss a week, giving you an extra week to cut your losses and get rid of him before he drops way back down. He had good scores in Brisbane and or against shit teams. With that theory in mind, there is hope this week, I will admit. Good luck.

I recon it sucks arse that dream team can come so close to breaking up strong/long term relationships. For me, the worst time came in the last days of unlimited trading. It was like my girlfriend all of a sudden wanted to do all this stuff at really bad times. I’m sure you can all relate to what I’m saying, there are times when you really need to spend a good hour picking between a couple of players. I’m sure girls have a sixth sense in predicting these times and conjure up elaborate schemes to get you away from the computer. Now I live with a pack of dream team fanatic arseholes that spend as much time trying to fuck up everyone else’s team as they do selecting their own. I have not discounted the fact that they may have been putting these thoughts in her head. I have tried reverse psychology, (you get a team babe, you’d be good at it) (I cant wait to take you out with the 50,000 I can win if I put in the hours and ill take you on the best holiday) all to no avail unfortunately. Dream teamers, remember this, DT is thicker than water, girlfriends come and go, but DT lasts forever. Stay strong team.

I recon that the DT draw to play others in your league, have not been done fairly. Well, I am really just speaking from experience. Im currently ranked 3rd in my league and my first 5 games are all top 6 teams. I don’t like that. I like a couple of bunny teams chucked in so I can have a few good nights sleep and shit like that. There is a chance I have a couple of form slumps and be 0 and 5 and sitting rock bottom!! Ahh hang on, I gotta grab my fucking asthma spray at the mere thought of that shit! Ok, im right now, but seriously, not cool. Oh yeah, someone asked last week where im sitting in the rankings. Doesn’t get me a whole lot of street cred, but im 2000th or so and improving. I know its not too good at the moment, but I know what im talking about and still gunning for the elite.

I recon it is bullshit that every DT try hard I talk to, has “another team” that they whipped up and don’t care about. These “other teams” are always going really well and shit like that. How about you harden the fuck up and stop self handicapping. Have some balls and stop second guessing yourself, and go with your first thoughts with your number one team instead of having your “other team”.

I recon it is funny how the biggest talking point in australia at the moment is dt. No matter where you are, you can feel comfortable asking somebody “hows the dt mate?” “who you got as captain champ?” and you will get an answer. If you don’t get an answer, or they look at you with a blank look, don’t worry, they are a wanker and stop talking to them. These people need to get a life. It was funny the other Saturday night, I was sitting with my dream team buddy in the saints member section at Telstra drome (not a saint fan). The worst thing you could do there was mention a positive word about the bulldogs. If you were so stupid, you could expect a beer thrown at your head, abuse thrown your way, or even sauce flicked at you….. low I know, but yes tomato sauce!! Anyway, I witnessed the most daring thing ive seen in a long time. A (mega hardcore) kid in front of me, stood up and passionately cheered a goal by adam cooney. I ducked in anticipation of what was to come. As the tension grew, he came up with the only possible answer to get him out of the deepest shit ever. As the saints faithful loaded up, he pulled the old, “come on guys, he is my dream team captain, I need the points” haha, all good, he was out of it. All he copped after that was a couple of fair calls along the line of, “you must have a fuckin shit team mate” yes he must.

Tip for the week- make lion JB your captain. Not jono brown, jared brennan. Ok warnie?

Troy out.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ah YES! Troy is back and back bigger than ever. I RECON you have hit the nail on the head. My hand is up, I got Brennan and I feel stupid. You're right, friends will come and go as will the girls who try hard to russell hinder our efforts each week. So hold grudges and hack on your mates every chance you get. CALVIN

Anonymous said...

Troy just gets bigger and better each week. Totally feeling for you in regards to the girls. The female of the species just don't understand. Life in NZ is tough with the lack of interest in both AFL and DT. Troy (and, of course, the rest of the DT Talk team) make life worth living. Love your work.

Anonymous said...

thanks burto, its people like you with inspirational stories of dt survival in times ofadversity that keep us all strong . living the dream burto, living the dream team
troy

Anonymous said...

brennan captain.. he's due!

Anonymous said...

wow man...

while burto might be the soul of this party, you give it the rock that it needs...

together with troy, you really make "DT Talk"